SARAH PALIN HAS A CREATOR ... ALSO HAS A DAUGHTER THAT LIKES TO GET DOWN

Back in the Anchorage Daily News in 2006, Palin was quoted trying to backtrack about wanting Creationism taught alongside Evolution in public schools:

"It's OK to let kids know that there are theories out there," she said in the interview. "They gain information just by being in a discussion."

That was how she was brought up, she said. Her father was a public school science teacher.

"My dad did talk a lot about his theories of evolution," she said. "He would show us fossils and say, 'How old do you think these are?'

Asked for her personal views on evolution, Palin said, "I believe we have a creator."

She would not say whether her belief also allowed her to accept the theory of evolution as fact.

"I'm not going to pretend I know how all this came to be," she said.

She's "not going to pretend to know how this all came to be," but at the same time is going to pretend to know "we have a creator." I'm no logic master, but i think back-to-back statements like this aren't going help her out much in the presidential debates. Joe Biden must creaming his pants right now at the idea of going a few oral rounds with her this fall. (pun intended)

Maybe she should take some time off the Creationism and spend a little more effort getting Sex Ed. into her daughter's classroom.

BTW ... I feel so cheated growing up in such a liberal, non-religious school system. I missed out on so much conservative-repressed hot box... just waiting to act-out against their bible thumping parents.

'CAUSE YOU GOTTA HAVE FAITH!

16-year-old Neil Beagley's family may as well have hit the repeat button on the song "Faith" by George Michael alongside Neil's hospital bed. I assume this is what is meant by faith healing.

Tuesday's death of 16-year-old Neil Beagley, however, may not be a crime because Oregon law allows minors 14 and older to decide for themselves whether to accept medical treatment.

"All of the interviews from last night are that he did in fact refuse treatment," police Sgt. Lynne Benton said Wednesday. "Unless we can disprove that, charges probably won't be filed in this case."

An autopsy Wednesday showed Beagley died of heart failure caused by a urinary tract blockage.

He likely had a congenital condition that constricted his urinary tract where the bladder empties into the urethra, and the condition of his organs indicates he had multiple blockages during his life, said Dr. Clifford Nelson, deputy state medical examiner for Clackamas County.

Nelson said a catheter would have saved the boy's life. If the condition had been dealt with earlier, a urologist could easily have removed the blockage and avoided the kidney damage that came with the repeated illnesses, Nelson said.

It seems like God is pretty vengeful. He keeps killing people with fairly simple illnesses that were cured a long time ago, no matter how many members of the congregation get together and pray for them?? What a jerk.

I'm not saying someone should drop a nasty case of Pneumonia on churches that endorse faith healing, so these amazingly stupid losers can't reproduce anymore ... but i'm not not saying it either.

I'M ONLY 8 POINTS AWAY FROM MY GAY BASHING BADGE

To recap, the Boy Scouts of America use publicy funded buildings and army camps for their meetings and jamboree, yet claim they can exclude atheists and gays from their lame club because they are a private organization. Makes sense to me.

So no gays or atheists but pedofiles ... come on in! You can touch little boys as along as you stick to the oath and do your duty to God while being "morally straight."

"I think it's pretty terrible the Boy Scouts have created a nation-wide safe haven for pedofiles."
Sincerely, My Space

MY GOD COULD BEAT UP YOUR GOD

I have yet to hear a coherent answer from someone of any religion who can explain the phenomenon of all the different religions. Usually their answer goes something to the effect of ... "BAAAaaaaah, all the other religions are silly and wrong. My God's obviously the real one."

As a Christian can't you see that there are Muslims who are just as devout about their faith as you are with yours? Or is that what blind faith is all about? Not seeing others in the world around you.

OBAMA BELIEVES IN THE WRONG FAIRY TALE, IS GOING TO "DESTROY THE U.S. FROM THE INSIDE OUT"

So i was forwarded this email the other day...

If you do not ever forward anything else, please forward this to all your contacts. This is very scary to think of what lies ahead of us here in our own United States…please heed this and pray about it and share it.

Who is Barack Obama? Probable U. S. presidential candidate, Barack Hussein Obama was born in Honolulu, Hawaii, to Barack Hussein Obama, Sr., a black MUSLIM from Nyangoma-Kogel, Kenya and Ann Dunham, a white ATHIEST from Wichita, Kansas. Obama's parents met at the University of Hawaii. When Obama was two years old, his parents divorced. His father returned to Kenya. His mother then married Lolo Soetoro, a RADICAL Muslim from Indonesia.When Obama was 6 years old, the family relocated to Indonesia. Obama attended a MUSLIM school in Jakarta. He also spent two years in a Catholic school.

Obama takes great care to conceal the fact that he is a Muslim. He is quick to point out that, 'He was once a Muslim, but that he also attended Catholic school.' Obama's political handlers are attempting to make it appear that he is not a radical. Obama's introduction to Islam came via his father, and that this influence was temporary at best. In reality, the senior Obama returned to Kenya soon after the divorce, and never again had any direct influence over his son's education. Lolo Soetoro, the second husband of Obama's mother, Ann Dunham, introduced his stepson to Islam. Obama was enrolled in a Wahabi school in Jakarta. Wahabism is the RADICAL teaching that is followed by the Muslim terrorists who are now waging Jihad against the western world. Since it is politically expedient to be a CHRISTIAN when seeking major public office in the United States, Barack Hussein Obama has joined the United Church of Christ in an attempt to downplay his Muslim background. ALSO, keep in mind that when he was sworn into office he DID NOT use the Holy Bible, but instead the Koran.Barack Hussein Obama will NOT recite the Pledge of Allegience NOR will he show any reverence for our flag. While others place their hands over their hearts, Obama turns his back to the flag and slouches.

Let us all remain alert concerning Obama's expected presidential candidacy. The Muslims have said they plan on destroying the US from the inside out, what better way to start than at the highest level - through the President of the United States, one of their own!!!!

It only takes a few seconds to forward this to your friends. Please understand the importance of this and don't let this man gain public office in Our country.

Holy Hell! The Muslims have infiltrated our governement! OH MY GOD! Thank God for fowarded mass emails, otherwise we might not have found out about this!

Obama must already have the media in his back pocket! That's the only possible reason Fox News isn't reading this email aloud on a 24-hour loop!

Just think, once we elect a terrorist into the White House he'll have ALL THE POWER. He'll be able to order U.S. factories to build WMDs and give them to Iran and Iraq. He'll insert Mulism-prayer into the schools ... And then he'll order troops to invade our own country! We'll be powerless to stop him because he's PRESIDENT!

Despite "taking great care to conceal the fact that he is Muslim," it's a good thing Obama's too stupid to change his name from "Barack Hussein Obama" to something a little more Christian-friendly. Maybe that's what tipped off the brilliant authors of this email to save the U.S.? In related news, I'm going to name my kid "Christian Awesome President." He'll be eleceted for sure! Yaaaaaay!

PS ... isn't it cute how people like Bill Clinton and Obama have to pretend to believe in God so they have a chance of being elected by the sheep chewing away on their God-cud in the south?

PPS For more Obama Girl visit amberleeonline.com

GEORGIAN PASTORS JUST CAN'T SEEM TO STOP EFFING KIDS, FAMILY

Seriously ... For pastors, having sex with kids must be more addictive than cigarettes and cocaine combined.

I heard this story on the radio today and couldn't believe the coincidence after my last post like an hour ago.

Decatur pastor faces at least 25 years in prison after being convicted of aggravated sexual battery and child molestation of his 15-year-old foster child, authorities said.

DeKalb County prosecutors contend Bishop Frederick Kelley, who headed Greater New Macedonia Church of God in Christ, had a history of child molestation and rape involving family members going back 35 years.

So naturally i had to mention it on here. But when I googled "Decatur, GA pastor" to find it ... this story was listed FIRST! Meaning the one i heard about on the radio TODAY wasn't even the first Decatur-church-sex-scandal google found! I guess they were a good 7 days apart though.

Could you even make that up?

In addition to somehow fathering his nephew (impressive!)...

The archbishop, his brother and the church are being sued by former church employee Mona Brewer, who says Earl Paulk manipulated her into an affair from 1989 to 2003 by telling her it was her only path to salvation. Earl Paulk admitted to the affair in front of the church last January.

Damn! I wish i could have found some girl(s) dumb enough to believe that the only path to salvation is through my penis. Where were these girls when i was in high school?

Really Mona? Really? Next your going to tell me Earl convinced you that when you die you drive through big pearly gates into a magical fairy land where all your dreams come true.

SOUTH PARK IS NOT NOT ENTERTAINING

Just watch to the 5:20 mark here. Good times...



To be completely fair, I think all religions are just about equally dumb. That's what i heart about South Park, they hit everyone. Even atheists in that one episode where the 2 atheist groups are fighting over what to call themselves. Hilarious.

I like how Muslims can't have sex or "jack off." Does anyone involved in religion see a pattern where repressed sexuality ends in disaster? I mean it's human/mammal instinct and biology to want sex. I think it's on the list somewhere after food and maybe before shelter.

How many priests have to molest school children before it's obvious that their profession isn't playing a role? OK, OK, you're right, we should investigate Ice Cream Truck drivers too. Fine.

WHO WANTS TO TAILGATE THIS WEEKEND?

Great news guys! The Westboro Baptist Church is coming to our state here in Minnesota to protest the funeral of a soldier that died in Afghanistan. Sounds like great fun!

It's kind of a haul from the Twin Cities so, I'm going to get over there a little early to get some beers and brats on the grill going while i paint up my "God Hates America" sign. Who's in?

We get it already Westboro Church ... Instead of making up signs that read "God Hates Fags" ... you may as write ones that read "Look at ME! I'm so extreme and edgy and controversial!"

Although writing this on my hugely popular blog just gave them a ton more exposure! What a fool! I've played right into their hands!

5 THINGS I LEARNED AT JESUS CAMP

Paraphrasing from the directors...

1. There are 80-100 million Evangelicals in the U.S. and the kids in this movie aren't just fringe wackos living far away from civilization. These are fairly mainstream people in the suburbs that go to Starbucks and shop at the GAP.

2. I don't think it's ever been more obvious that religion wouldn't exist if parents didn't shove it down the throats of their children. In the film, all sides pretty much admit this. These kids are pretty cute ... Makes it all the more sad the cycle goes on generation after generation. It's child abuse really, not letting them develop a self of themselves and the world without jamming dogma into it every step of the way.

3. Harry Potter is an enemy of God.

4. If you present an unbiased view of abortion to elementary children, they all will pray with you that it ends.

5. You have to ask God to bless your audio-visual equipment to ensure everything stays in working order.

(You could go on and on about this movie ... blah blah blah ... whatever your belief ... it's powerful ... go watch it. Like you haven't already ... what took me so long?)

DANIEL TOSH FINDS [ANOTHER] BIBLE LOOP HOLE

I went to his show last night. Obviously this guy's a comic genius, i'm sure you already knew that.

But after thinking about it, isn't he actually right? I don't think it does say you can't swear in the bible anywhere.

I mean it says you can't get tattoos or turn your daughter into a prostitute, otherwise I'd have done those things already. But hey, he'll let us swear! Yaaaay! This great news because i like to swear too!

Maybe this God guy isn't so fuckin' bad after all?